
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
A National Epidemic

If any of you are at work, take a stroll through the maze of cubicles and I guarantee you will find at least 3 women wearing scarves. For every 100 miles you go north of the Mason-Dixon line, multiply that number by 2. Now I understand why a scarf should be worn, to keep your neck and part of your face warm in blustery weather. So why do you keep it on indoors? The office is set at 72 degrees with no breeze. “But I’m always cold” says every woman that has ever walked the earth. A few suggestions….
1) Buy a shirt that is more than 1/32 of an inch thick (seriously, the one week that I worked folding clothes at the mall, I realized that most women’s clothing is thinner than Always Save brand toilet paper. It’s ridiculous).
2) Put on a sweater.
3) Put on a shirt that covers your chest (only applicable to some).
If you only wear the scarf because you are cold, then why didn’t I see you wearing one back in 2003? And I swear I saw some girls wearing scarves in the middle of July here in Kansas City. Really, are you cold? At that same time my only goal isn’t to get pit stains from sweating so much, and you have a 6 foot long piece of wool wrapped around your neck. You know the long haired punk rock kid that wears a beanie year round while he skateboards? You look just as dumb.
Overall ladies, you look like f*cking idiots, like a cross between someone with whiplash and a Burmese python snake charmer. But you're doing it just to stay warm, right?
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Emo Kids

-I hate The Shane Company. No one outside of Kansas City will know what I'm talking about (unless this chain of jewelery stores is in more places than KC), but they have the most annoying radio commercials ever. I only listen to 3 radio stations, but about 33.8% of all commercials on these stations have the same annoying-ass monotone voice saying how their jewels are of high quality and....well, as I don't even know the rest because I change the station. Then there is a good chance that the station I change it to also is having a commercial for The Shane Company on at the same time, in which case I just drive off the nearest cliff. If for some reason I ever buy a piece of jewelery, I know that it will no be with the company owned by Mr. Tom Shane.
-So I found out the hard way that when Match.com says they have a guarentee of finding love, they only mean that they will give you 6 months free after you pay, and that after that 6 months is up they just bug the fuck out of you to sign up for 6 more months of Match.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
This Pretty Much Sums It Up

Saturday, January 16, 2010
I'M BAAAAAACK!!!!!!

I seem to have lost my camera, so there might not be as many pictures as before, but that means plenty more room for my random thoughts.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Recipe
Here's the recipe for the jerk marinade from the last post...
Jamaican Jerk Sauce
6 Hot Peppers, anything from Jalapenos to Habaneros
2 Tablespoons Dried Thyme
2 Tablespoons Ground Allspice
1 Small Piece Fresh Ginger, peeled and roughly chopped
1 Bulb of Garlic (yes, a whole bulb), peeled
3 Onions, peeled and roughly chopped
2 Tablespoons Sugar
1 Tablespoon Salt
1 Teaspoon Pepper
½ Cup Olive Oil
½ Cup Soy Sauce
1 Cup Orange Juice
1 Cup Apple Cider Vinegar
Place all ingredients in a blender, blend until smooth. Save some of the marinade to use as a dipping sauce for cooked meat. Marinate meat overnight. I usually use chicken thighs or thin sliced pork loin, and this recipe makes a large amount of marinade so you can cook up to 10 pounds of meat. Grill meat over medium heat and enjoy!
Jamaican Jerk Sauce
6 Hot Peppers, anything from Jalapenos to Habaneros
2 Tablespoons Dried Thyme
2 Tablespoons Ground Allspice
1 Small Piece Fresh Ginger, peeled and roughly chopped
1 Bulb of Garlic (yes, a whole bulb), peeled
3 Onions, peeled and roughly chopped
2 Tablespoons Sugar
1 Tablespoon Salt
1 Teaspoon Pepper
½ Cup Olive Oil
½ Cup Soy Sauce
1 Cup Orange Juice
1 Cup Apple Cider Vinegar
Place all ingredients in a blender, blend until smooth. Save some of the marinade to use as a dipping sauce for cooked meat. Marinate meat overnight. I usually use chicken thighs or thin sliced pork loin, and this recipe makes a large amount of marinade so you can cook up to 10 pounds of meat. Grill meat over medium heat and enjoy!
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